For the past few days I have been contemplating the bitter loss BYU had to Utah. I kept asking myself the question, "Why is it that I hate Utah so much?" I finally realized, it's not that I actually hate the University of Utah, it's that I have such an intense love for BYU. I mean my Dad did his masters program at the U, my oldest sister is applying to finish her schooling for nursing there, I have friends who have attended school there, and I was even born at the U of U hospital. (Shh don't tell anyone.) I know plenty of amazing people who are fans of the U, so then why do I get so worked up when BYU plays the Utes?
This isn't just a one-word answer. This stems back to my childhood and back to something most Mormons who grew up in Utah will never understand. Ever since I can remember the only college I wanted to attend when I grew up was BYU. Remember those papers they passed out at the beginning of every school year you had to fill out with the "Short and Long Term Goals?" Well I have papers that date back to the 1st grade and on every paper under the "Long Term Goals" is written "Attend BYU." Sure, it probably started with the fact that my parents both went there, met there, and then got married. Or it could also do with the fact that our cousins from Sandy, UT, who we often visited growing up, were huge BYU fans as well. So whatever the reason my love for BYU stems from may be, the passion comes from so much more.
Growing up outside of Utah, I was the only Mormon in my group of friends at school. They didn't know who Brigham Young was so every time I would wear my "BYU" sweatshirt, to them it stood for "Buy Your Underwear." From a young age I learned that wearing that sweatshirt meant something much more than just being a fan of some college, it meant being an example of what I believed in.
One of the biggest reasons I absolutely love BYU goes back to when I was 15 and I attended my first year of EFY. Most members of the church I have met who are born and raised in Utah don't attend EFY so, again, they might not understand this reason. But being on BYU's campus for that week, and other weeks in the years that followed, had a huge impact on my life. I had some of my very first spiritual experiences during those influential weeks. Some may or may not agree with me, but there is a certain spirit you feel when on BYU's campus and to me, it's undeniable.
I honestly never cared about the U of U growing up in California. Everyone there who was LDS liked BYU, I mean who wouldn't? There is no "rivalry" there so I didn't care or give much thought to the U as a kid. I mean, I knew they were BYU's rival but it's not like I hated them. So why do I buy into the whole rivalry now?
The answer is this. BYU to me isn't just a school. Growing up it stood as a message to me that, "Hey you can come here and have friends and be surrounded by people who believe in the same things you do. You can come here and not be teased for your beliefs. You can come here and escape the liberal views of the world." That message BYU sent to me was huge. As you can imagine, at times, growing up without many LDS friends was hard. BYU was the light at the end of the tunnel. BYU is a major reason as to why my life is where it is today, and BYU has played a role in shaping and strengthening my testimony.
So of course it's hard for me when I come in contact with other members of the church who have given me their reasons for hating BYU like:
- "Why would you want to go to a school where they make you take religion classes?"
- "I think it's so weird that they pray before each class."
- "I would never go their because of the Honor Code. Why do I need my school to babysit me and give me a curfew?"
These statements are the very reason I have bought into this rivalry so much. I can't nor will I ever be able to understand why someone who has the same beliefs as me can hate a University because we pray before class. Aren't we told to pray always? In my mind Heavenly Father gave me my mind and body along with the opportunity to learn, so I want to say a prayer and thank him before I learn. I think it's awesome. I love the fact that I took religion classes. In fact, they were my favorite classes I took while attending BYU. The opportunity to learn more about the gospel is something I value and cherish. I don't think it's just something you do on Sunday, so why not take a class 3 times a week about the Old Testament or the Living Prophets? And last but not least, the Honor Code. Now I think a lot of people who don't go to BYU don't understand the Honor Code. In fact, I believe it does a lot of good. That's not to say that I was in bed every night by 12:00. No one is there to force you to make the right decisions or take your agency away; that's not what the Honor Code is about. The Honor Code is simply guidelines that in fact come from the standards of the Church and are in place for a reason; a very good reason at that. So if your excuse for not liking BYU is because you think the Honor Code is absurd, you might want to take that up with the Big Man upstairs.
Some say that us BYU fans are self righteous and that's why they can't stand BYU. Are there some ridiculous fans here and there who may have said or done something stupid? Of course. There are people like that from all walks of life, no matter what religion or school they affiliate themselves with. Trust me, we don't think of ourselves as more righteous than others. Maybe what it comes down to is that BYU means something more than you will ever be able to understand.
So do I hate the University of Utah along with their entire fan base and student body? No. Obviously there are good people who go there. When I use the phrase on a picture or on Facebook that says "I hate the Utes," take that as you want, but to me it's just about the football. I love football and love watching it more than any other sport. I get intense when it's my teams playing. So saying I hate the Utes is just the same to me as when I said "I hate the Seahawks" a week ago when the 49ers lost to them, and no one seemed to care or get offended when I said that. I love football and will always be faithful to my teams.
Especially to the one that stands for so much more than football to me.
